[in alley]

AL: It's nice. It's very nice. Once again you're a regular Bonnie Parker kid.

Celine: I told you.

AL: Yes, you did.

Celine: and I also told you there's more where that came from.

AL: Yes you did.

Celine: good. Then this time I want - [he grabs her and pushes her to the hood of his car]

AL: No, this time I do the telling and I want you to stop yanking my chain. Stop laying games. I want the rest of that stuff and I want it tonight.

Celine: Look, I told you it is not that easy-

AL: I don't think you heard me. I said-[she pulls a gun and he lets her go] Don't hurt yourself with that.

Celine: Don't try and hold me.

AL: Why? And get shot? Huh uh. But I'll be seeing you again cookie. I want what you got.

[bar]

Fraser: I can't thank you enough Ray.

Ray: Well you're right about that. So why's Thatcher so hot to get this hooch, anyway.

Fraser: Well, the superintendent General is due in from Moose Jaw today and apparently he's quite particular to it. Inspector Thatcher is nothing if not gracious.

Ray: Well, next time try and tell me sooner, okay? Yo, Murph.

Murph: Yo, Ray. Good to see you lad.

Ray: I'd like you to meet a good friend of mine. Benny Fraser, Kevin

Murphy.

Murph: Pleasure.

Fraser: Like wise.

Murph: He told me you were in a jam. Glad to help out.

Fraser: I very much appreciate that sir.

Ray: Murph's the Man, Fraser. He collects hooch the way my sister collects losers. You know what his nickname is?

Fraser: I haven't a clue.

Ray: The Whiskey King of the Windy City. Isn't that great?

Fraser: Now see, Ray, I find that difficult to believe, in that nicknames generally tend to be a bit shorter...Whiskey King or Windy Guy.

Ray: Yeah, well, that's his nickname, all right? The Whiskey King of the Windy City. You ask anybody.

Fraser: Excuse me, sir, what is the bartender's nickname?

Guy: Murph.

Murph: There you are boys. My last bottle of Glenndolane scotch whiskey. That's sheer drops of the angel of my own granddad use to call it. This might be the last bottle in the city. It's a shame to part with it.

Ray: Yeah but five hundred American ought to dull the pain, huh Murph?

Murph: It might Ray, that it might. Show me the color of your money, she's all yours.

[as Fraser counts it out, Ray spots someone]

Ray: Annie? Annie McGray?

Annie: Ray? Ray Vecchio.

Ray: Yeah.

Annie: Hi.

Ray: Hi. You uh...you look like a uh...are you a?

Annie: A nun.

Ray: You're a nun! You're a nun.

Annie: You're surprised.

Ray: Yeah, I'm surprised. How long have you been uh...you been good?

Annie: I - yeah. Actually Ray, I'm in bit of a hurry. I'm trying to find this girl. Does she look familiar? Her names Celine. She's the one on the right.

Ray: uh, she looks a little young to be making the bar scene.

Annie: She is. False ID's are easy to come by these days. I usually find her in one of these places on Rush Street.

Ray: Well, if you want I could put some manpower on it. Believe it or not, I'm a cop.

Annie: Oh, no. no. that's fine. Thanks Ray. Good to see you.

Ray: Annie.

Guy in bar: Did we forget our listening ears?

Ray: No pal, did you? [the two of them scuffle, Dief whines, Fraser looses the bottle and it breaks]

Fraser: Oh dear.

Murph: Sorry lad. No refunds.

[Ray rushes out but she's gone.]

[at St. Fortuna School]

Ray: Annie? Excuse me. Annie? Do you have a minute?

Annie: See you girls later. [to Ray] Ray, I'm sorry about last night.

Ray: You're sorry. I almost got my head bashed in.

Annie: Yeah, well, I'm glad you didn't. I just don't want the police involved.

Ray: Look, forget the police. This is me alright? Now I did a little checking and I found out you're a big shot around here. I also found out that the girl you're looking for is one of your students.

Annie: Yes and I can find her myself. She's done this before.

Ray: Look, maybe I can help. Will you let me do this for you?

Annie: Off the record?

Ray: Yeah, off the record. Now I'm gonna have to ask some questions. You know, turn over some rocks.

Annie: No, that's exactly what I don't need. The cops barging in here upsetting the girls. I'll tell you what's going on as long as it stays between us. Okay?

Ray: Well I don't know if I can do that.

Annie: Ray!

Ray: Of course, just between you and me.

Annie: You haven't changed since high school. [he laughs]Come on in.

[Riv]

Ray: So the kids today turn out to be pretty wild. She likes to run away. And Annie tracks her down. Now Annie doesn't want to report it because if she does, she's going to be sent home and home isn't a pretty place. Three stepfathers in the past six years. But this time there's something different going on. Some of the girls are getting out of hand. Check this out. [hands Fraser a gun]

Fraser: Interesting. A hildebrand Yankee 38. You don't see these very often.

Ray: no. that's why I ran the numbers on it. You're never gonna guess who it's register to.

Fraser: Elliott Ness?

Ray: How did you know that?

Fraser: Well it's quite simple, Ray.

Ray: No simple for you is some long drawn out story from you from your grandmother's library in Runamukluk.

Fraser: Well, actually, it is quite simple. It's engraved right here. 'E. Ness.' Now guessing that the 'E' stood for Eliot was just inspiration.

Ray: Here. Give me that. You're not suppose to be carrying a gun anyway.

Fraser: Tu7ktoyaktuk.

Ray: What?

Fraser: You said 'Runamukluk' I assume you're referring to the time when my grandmother moved her traveling library to Tuktoyaktuk.

Ray: Oh, Tuk-toy-ak-tuk, Runamukluk - what's the difference?

Fraser: Well about 2000 kilometers.

Ray: Is that necessary?

Fraser: Not entirely, no.

Ray: Okay, so the question is, how does a 16 year old Catholic schoolgirl get a hold of the gun owned by the man who brought down Al Capone? That is the question, not whether or not Tuktoyaktuk and Runamukluk are 2000 miles apart.

Fraser: Kilometers and I have no idea.

Ray: Well, neither do I. When Annie told me she found the gun in Celine's room, I knew she was in real trouble. That's why I've been on the phone all morning beating the bushes for a likely recruit. Annie's going to let me plant a teacher on the inside to get a lead on this Celine girl. The only catch is, it can't be a cop and she's got to be a woman.

[they get out and go to a door]

Fraser: So have you found someone?

Ray: Yeah, Brenda Luisi. She retired from the force last year. I'm just going to drop these plans for the school off.

Fraser: Oh Ray, this is for you. [a note. Fraser opens it] Oh the poor girl. She's broken her leg.

Ray: She broke her leg? How could she break her leg? I just spoke to her an hour ago.

Fraser: She's staying at her mother's house.

Ray: I can't let Annie down. Alright look, I've got to have somebody in there first thing in the morning. I'm going to go back to the office and make some calls. Could I drop you off somewhere?

Fraser: No, that's alright. I'm a [looks around and points] I'm going over here.

[27th precinct. Extremely nice pair of ankles pass through the shot, down the stairs, pan up the figure as she turns into bull pin. We see her back.

Huey looks her over appreciatively]

Elaine [to woman]: Niman's brand isn't it?

Ms. Fraser: Sears.

Elaine: Really? It's looks fabulous on you.

Ms. Fraser: Thank you.

[Welsh spots her]

Welsh: I'll call ya back. Hello, I'm Lt. Welsh. Is there anything I can assist you with?

Ms. Fraser: I'm here to see Detective Vecchio.

Welsh: He's office is right around here. I'll escort you personally.

Ms. Fraser: That really won't be necessary.

Ray: Samantha, come on. I'm dying here. Yeah, I had somebody but she fell through. [Ms. Fraser sits down at Ray's desk] Look, it's just for a couple of days, I'll pay you out of my own pocket. [to Ms. Fraser] I'll be right with you. Look, look, Sam, school gave you allergies because somebody was grading you. This time you're gonna be the one doing the grading. Thanks for nothing. Elaine!

Ms. Fraser: I'll do the job.

Ray: I don't even know who you are.

Ms. Fraser: Actually I believe you do.

Ray: I'm sorry, I don't.

Ms. Fraser: Ray, it's me.

Ray [looking her over: Fraser?

[walking down the street]

Ray: You're not gong to fool anyone in drag.

Ms. Fraser: Well I fooled you Ray.

Ray: Ah, this is crazy. I know I'm in a bind and I need some help but this is going to far.

Ms. Fraser: Well I'm sure if the situation were reversed you'd do exactly the same for me.

Ray: Not in a million years.

Ms. Fraser: Really?

Ray: I'd never be caught dead in drag.

Ms. Fraser: Well there's nothing to be ashamed of Ray. In fact, certain tribes in the northwest - T'glinket believe a man should experience life as a woman in order to be a better husband-

Ray: Alright, alright. Okay, but it's only because I'm in a bind. Now, I'll run it by Sister Ann and if she says it's okay, then we'll do it but if anyone gets wise, it just wasn't my idea. Do you understand?

Ms. Fraser: Understood. Oh, one other question. Do you think teal is my color or should I lean toward mustard?

Ray: Who cares?

Ms. Fraser: Well I do.

[at the school]

Annie: When Ray told me he was sending help to find Celine I had no idea this is what he meant.

Ms. Fraser: Well neither did he. And I'll confess there are certain aspects of this assignment that are beyond the scope of my training.

Annie: I can see that.

Ms. Fraser: You can?

Annie: Um, you-you've got a tag hanging from your wig.

Ms. Fraser: Rectified.

Annie: I think you'll find they're rather a spirited class. I hope you're prepared. [passing a boy on a ladder] That's Todd Scollick. By the attitude you'd think he ran the place. He isn't much of a handyman. [entering classroom] You ready? Class. Girls, can I have your attention please. Thank you. Sister Viola is ill today and this is her replacement, Ms. Fraser. Please make her feel welcome.

Wanda [coughing in hand to cover remark of:} Yeah, right.

Annie: Wanda, would you like to repeat that?

Wanda: I didn't say anything sister.

Annie: Good luck.

Wanda: She's going to need it.

Tiffany: Totally.

[Wanda spits a spit ball at Ms. Fraser's back, who whips around and catches it]

Ms. Fraser: I believe this is yours.

Wanda: You weren't even looking.

Ms. Fraser: No, its completely unnecessary if you have even the rudimentary understanding of the principals of aerodynamics, wind displacement and trajectory. I'd be happy to explain them to you if you like.

Wanda: That's okay.

Ms. Fraser: It's your loss. [walks around with seating chart] Are you Melissa?

Melissa: Uh huh.

Ms. Fraser: Oh, this is you. It's very good.

Melissa: Thanks.

Ms. Fraser: She seems a little sad, don't you think?

Melissa: I guess.

Ms. Fraser: [hmms and starts manipulating the face of the clay figure]Smile. No, really smile. Smile. That's it. Who's work is that?

Melissa: Oh that's Celine's.

Ms. Fraser: She's not here?

Wanda: Celine took off.

Ms. Fraser: Oh. And where did she go?

Wanda: Ask Ducky.

Melissa: My name is Melissa.

Wanda: She's Celine's little gopher.

Tiffany [Wanda's little gopher]: Totally.

Melissa: That's not true.

Ms. Fraser: There. It takes seven fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown. Save your energy, you're going to need it in your child-bearing years.

[hall]

Annie: So did they eat you alive?

Ms. Fraser: Although I confess I was extremely nervous. The girls are very sweet. And uh, I did make contact with Melissa although she wasn't very forth coming about Celine.

Annie: She thinks she's protecting her.

Ms. Fraser: That's what friends do for each other. [they separate and Ms. Fraser goes up stairs...followed by Ray]

Ray: Psst. Fraser!

Ms. Fraser: Ray, what are you doing here?

Ray: Look, I've been over Rush Street and The Loop and Lincoln Park putting the word out on Celine. Nothing. Since I was in the neighborhood, I figured I'd come by and see how you were doing.

Ms. Fraser: Oh, still to early to tell.

Ray: Right-right-right. I see you were speaking to Sister Anne?

Ms. Fraser: Yes.

Ray: That's good. That's really really good. Uh...did my name come up?

Ms. Fraser: I can't say as it did. No. is there something on your mind Ray?

Ray: No-na-na...Well, sine you asked, if my name does come up, now, I'm not asking you to twist her arm or anything but I'm just kinda curious what she thinks of me. You know, if she's holding a grudge or anything.

Ms. Fraser: A grudge?

Fraser: Well, you know Sister Ann and I were, you know, used to be boyfriend and girlfriend. I mean, before she was Sister Ann. And uh, ya know, things were going along and I wanted to get a little more intimate, you know, do more of the boyfriend / girlfriend stuff, if you know what I mean?

Ms. Fraser: All too clearly.

Ray: Okay, so there we were, doing a little bit of this a little bit of that and all of a sudden her ol' man comes bursting through the door and he blows up like Krakatoa! He starts calling me all kinds of terrible names and forbids her from ever seeing me again. It was ugly, Fraser.

Ms. Fraser: I can imagine.

Ray: Alright. So the question is, do you think that someone can get over that? You know, take it in stride and move on with their lives?

Ms. Fraser: Ray, are you asking this question because...[Ray nods] and you think she became [Ray nods and Ms. Fraser gives him a look]

Ray: I knew it. Thanks.

[Melissa's room]

Melissa: Ms. Fraser.

Ms. Fraser: Are you alright?

Melissa: Yeah, I'm okay.

Ms. Fraser: You seemed upset earlier.

Melissa: No, I'm alright.

Ms. Fraser: Can I come in?

Melissa: Um, I guess.

Ms. Fraser: You're worried about Celine, aren't' you?

Melissa: Oh, she'll be okay. I mean, I'm sure she'll be okay. She always comes back.

Ms. Fraser: And you and she are best friends.

Melissa: Well, she's the only one here I trust. Nobodies ever really who they say they are.

Ms. Fraser: Do you know where she is?

Melissa: No I-I know she disappeared.

Ms. Fraser: Well, let's see what we can see. This is Celine's side? Her school blazers still here which indicates she changed into her street clothes before leaving which means she probably wasn't' kidnapped. On the other hand, this collection of stuffed animals suggests that she had to leave before she had time to pack her favorite things.

Melissa: Hey, you're pretty good. [Ms. Fraser sniffs shoe] You really don't want to be doing that. Those are her gym shoes.

Ms. Fraser: I think she does more than gym in these shoes. There are traces of limestone and fungus. Or is it mold?

Melissa: Ew, Miss, you really don't want to be doing that.

Ms. Fraser: Fungus [sits on bed] Huh. Boing, boing, boing [as she bounces]

Melissa: What are you doing?

Ms. Fraser: That's interesting. The springs 14 through 18 are out of line. May I?

Melissa: Yes. [Ms. Fraser feels under the mattress]

Ms. Fraser: Does Celine have uh, problems with her back?

Melissa: Sometimes.

Ms. Fraser: A diary.

Melissa: That's her diary, you don't want to read that. She's my friend.

Ms. Fraser: I understand.

Melissa: You mean you're not if I don't give it to you?

Ms. Fraser: Not if you don't want to.

Melissa: Yeah, but you're a teacher.

Ms. Fraser: That doesn't mean I can't respect peoples decisions. We'll just have to find another way to help Celine. And of course that is what she needs right now. She needs our help.

Melissa: Ms. Fraser? Don't tell Celine I gave it to you. [gives her the diary]

[Ray is driving the Riv, Ms. Fraser is in the back seat changing clothes]

Ray: Fraser.

Fraser: Hm humm?

Ray: Aw you're not even listening. What are you doing back there?

Fraser: Well I'm changing and I'm reading Celine's diary. Listen. "The scent of pungent flowers drifted into the crypt like gossamer lace as my love took me into his powerful arms and made love to me.

Ray: The girl's a poet.

Fraser: Hm humm.

Ray: What is going on back there?

Fraser: Well let me tell you something Ray, I think that the person who invented panty hose should be brought up on charges of cruelty, sadism and reckless endangerment. They pinch in the most inappropriate places.

Ray: Yeah, well most people who wear em don't have those places, Benny.

Fraser: I got a run. [in his nylons]

Ray: What else does the diary say?

Fraser: Um. "Cries of ecstasy burst from me as the fire had branded the depths of my soul with a love that could never be quenched. I gift to him with a treasure of gold and time and he gifted me with his love.

Ray: I'm no English major but that stuff is so purple I'm getting diabetes.

Fraser: You just mixed a metaphor, Ray.

Ray: Yeah, well I said I was no English major. Well it sounds like to me if we find the guy with the powerful arms, the unquenchable fire, that's the guy who has her.

Fraser: Well, yes, I think you're right.

Ray: Now did she say anything else about the guy like height weight hair color, distinguishable marks, that sort of thing?

Fraser: Ray, it's a diary, it's not a police report. However, I did notice that the handyman Todd was wearing a watch and not just any ordinary watch,

Ray, it was a vintage 1930 audemares-piquet, moon phase chronometer in 18 carrot gold. Only 100 were made.

Ray: Yeah, she gifted her lover with time and gold.

Fraser: Precisely.

Ray: Alright, I'll go check out this Todd guy while you make out your report.

Fraser: Right.

Ray: Oh and Benny before I drop you off?

Fraser: Uh huh?

[Ray circles around his own ear with his finger, Fraser looks in the mirror and removes the ear rings.

[Consulate]

Thatcher: I gave you one job Fraser, albeit a menial one nevertheless one which would allow me to brighten the life of a man that I respect more than anyone else in this force. A man who I hold dearer than my own father.

Fraser: I'm working on it.

Thatcher: I've seen you track a snowflake back from the cloud it came from. Finding one single bottle of scotch whiskey can't be that hard.

Fraser: You wouldn't think so, no.

Thatcher: No, you wouldn't. is that perfume I smell Fraser?

Fraser: Passion flower, ma'am.

[Ray's desk]

Ray: Yeah, that's right. Glenndolane. Not since 1965? Oh come on Sulley, you've got to do better than that. Oh yeah and when you wanted the parking tickets fixed who did you call, huh? Yeah, thanks for nothing.

Elaine: Ray, I got the address on Todd Scollick. 420 West Lexington.

Ray: Nice neighborhood.

Elaine: You want to hear his history?

Ray: Yeah.

Elaine: He went down for grand theft auto in '94, the school put him on the work release program to integrate him back into society.

Ray: Well it looks like old Todd integrated himself back into the slammer.

[Pawn shop]

Celine: Look, are you interested or not. There's lots of other places we could take it.

Johnstone: No, it's quite nice.

Celine: Alright so how much?

Johnstone: Well, it's all based on how much I can get for it and a piece like this rarely-

Todd: If you don't want it, it's okay.

Johnstone: It doesn't mean I won't give you a fair price. I was thinking something in the neighborhood of a hundred dollars.

Celine: that's the wrong neighborhood.

Johnstone: Two hundred. That's all you'll get anywhere.

Celine: Done.

Johnstone: It is a lovely piece. You mind if I ask you where you came across it?

Celine: Yeah. You know what? I do.

[they leave and Johnstone makes a call. Across the street in an apartment building, Ray knocks on a door]

Ray: Chicago PD open up.

[street]

Todd: That antique dealer was asking too many questions.

Celine: What do we care? We're out of here, right? Right? Give me a hug

Todd.

[they pause, hug, blue van slowly approaches. Ray just used a wire to gain access in Todd's apartment, back to street]

Celine: It's that guy from the antique store. We should get out of here.

[they run, a car hits Todd. Ray looks out a window to see what is happening, then gets to the scene ASAP]

Ray: Police. Call 911.

[the school]

Annie: Melissa.

Melissa: Yes Sister Ann?

Annie: I have some sad news to deliver in Chapel tonight. But uh, I wanted to tell you first.

Melissa: Is it Celine? Is she okay?

Annie: It's about Todd.

[Ms. Fraser brings Melissa some tea and sits down with her]

Melissa: Celine was only seeing Todd for a couple of months. At first I thought it was just to make her parents crazy. Then I think she was really into him. She can have anyone she wanted, she's so pretty. So popular. And she was really great to me and now I wish she would come home. [starts crying]

Fraser: Don't. you'll just make your eyes all red for the dance.

Melissa: I don't want to go to the dance anyway. Might as well be invisible.

Ms. Fraser: You know when I was growing up in the far north I used to watch the girls in the village, the other girls and I would try to figure out exactly what it was that made one girl seem more popular than another or more in demand than another girl. And I used to think it was they were more attractive.

Melissa: Please, please. Don't tell me they want the plain girl cause I already know they don't.

Ms. Fraser: No actually, they wanted the girls with the sharpest teeth.

Melissa: Sharpest teeth?

Ms. Fraser: Yes. In the north sharp teeth are very important for cutting leather and manufacturing clothing.

Melissa: So you want me to sharpen my teeth?

Ms. Fraser: Now that's a thought. No. the point of the story is, it wasn't their teeth that made them popular. It was the self confidence that came from having a purpose and a goal. The young men responded to that.

Ms. Fraser: Would you accompany me to the dance?

Melissa: Yeah, I'd like that, thanks.

[on the way down the hall, Ms. Fraser runs a hand under a desk, smells it, tastes something from the floor...]

Wanda: We're onto you Miss.

Tiffany: Totally.

Wanda: We see the way you're always opening doors for women, the way you're like, incredibly tall and polite.

Tiffany: Totally.

Wanda: We hear the way you talk.

Tiffany: For sure.

Wanda: You know you can't fool us.

Tiffany: We should have known it right from the start.

Wanda: You're - a Canadian.

Ms. Fraser: Oh. So you think we could keep this between us?

Tiffany: We'll see.

[antique store. Ms. Fraser picks up a horn and honks it]

Ray: Put that down.

Johnstone: Good afternoon. Could I help you find something?

Ray: Well actually someone. We're looking for a missing person. Have you seen this girl?

Johnstone: Yes. She was in here yesterday.

Ray: Did she say anything about where she had been or where she was going? Anything that might help us?

Johnstone: Are you her parents?

Ray: No we're just interested parties. Look if she should come back could you give me a call? [writes down his number]

Ms. Fraser: Excuse me, would it trouble you too much if I had a look at that flask?

Johnstone: Oh, I see you have a taste for art deco. Now this is a very fine piece. From the early 20's. I just got it in. well are you going to buy it or what?

Ms. Fraser: [who licks the flask] No. Ray.

Ray: I'm sorry, I can't take her anywhere. If you should see her again, please call me. [Ms. Fraser is waiting at the door. Waiting for Ray to open it] What? You can't get it yourself?

[outside]

Ray: What were you doing?

Ms. Fraser: I recognize the spores on the flask Ray. It comes from the same fungus I found on the bottom of Celine's shoes.

Ray: Which means?

Ms. Fraser: Which means that she found the flask somewhere on the grounds of the school, snuck it out and came here to sell it.

Ray: So she's moving the stuff out of the school

Ms. Fraser: It would appear. And that's not all. There was a name engraved on the bottom of the flask. Frank Netti.

Ray: Ah, Al Capones right hand man. Frank Nitti's flask, Elliot Ness' gun.

What is this? A garage sale for the Untouchables?

Ms. Fraser: Well, if we can establish-Ray! [Ray has gone to the driver's side of car and hasn't opened the door for her] Manners.

Ray: Ya know Benny, there's a limit.

Ms. Fraser: A limit to good etiquette? I think not, Ray. [Ray does open the door for her]

Ray: Just get in the car before I beat you with our purse.

[antique shop]

Johnstone: You find the school with these uniforms, we find the girl's stash.

Al: Aw, there must be 30 schools with uniforms like that. Johnstone: With this crest?

[school]

Celine: Mel.

Melissa: Celine? Oh my God. When I heard about Todd...are you okay?

Celine: Not really, no.

Melissa: I don't know what to say to you. Is there anything I can do for you? Anything?

Celine: Yeah. Will you come with me?

Melissa: Celine, you mean runaway? Why can't you just stay in school?

Celine: Todd and I had such great plans. I-I have to do this for him.

Melissa: Celine, but it's dangerous.

Celine: Not if we get the rest of the stuff tonight. You have to come with me Mel, you're my best friend aren't' you?

Melissa: Of course I'm your best friend-

Celine: And-and best friends they stick together right?

Melissa: They stick together but that doesn't necessarily mean that we run away.

Celine: You can start living your life. And we'll be, we'll be rich. Listen, just meet me at the steam tunnels tonight, okay? 8:00. We'll get the rest of the stuff and we'll get out of this hell hole for good. Okay?

Melissa: I love you.

Celine: I love you too. 8:00 okay?

Melissa: Okay.

[at a home for elderly]

Ray; Hey, how's he doing?

Nurse: Oh, he's fine.

Ray: Hey, Uncle Lorenzo!

Lorenzo: Who's that?

Ray; It's me, Little Ray.

Lorenzo: Stand out here where I can see ya. Keep your hands out in the open.

Ray: Don't you remember? I came by at Christmas. I brought you chocolate cigars?

Lorenzo: Yeah. Maybe I see it now. I can't be too careful you know. I hear a crew out of Deerborn Park is looking to give me some swimming lessons.

Ray: Look, Uncle Lorenzo, I gotta ask you some questions.

Lorenzo: Everybody's asking me some questions.

Ray: About a gun. Elliot Ness' gun.

Nurse: Medicine time.

Lorenzo: Go on, get out of here. Look it Little Ray, anyone gets wind of this, I'm gonna wish the Deerborn Park got me.

Ray: I understand.

Lorenzo: Al's got it.

Ray: Capone?

Lorenzo: Shut up! What are you trying to do? Get me killed?

Ray: Are you telling me that Al Capone has Elliott Ness' gun?

Lorenzo: He did. The word is Vido swindled him out of it along with the rest of the stuff.

Ray: The rest of what stuff? Who's Vido?

Lorenzo: Vido Masushi. Al's brother-in-law. Don't you read the papers?

Ray: I've been kind of busy.

Lorenzo: Eh, he'd been taking from everyone. Capone, Netti, all the big boys. He's building himself up a nice stash. Gold, furs, hooch. The works. Ray; It takes a lot of jam to steal from Capone. So how many suits you pull off.

Lorenzo: The suits got this construction company. And he built the vault under the building he's working on.

Ray; This vault it wouldn't happen to have been under St. Fortuna would it?

Lorenzo: Who's been talking? I'm a dead man.

Ray: Look Uncle Lorenzo-

Lorenzo: Enough said. Get out of here. I don't know you. I never seen you before. I want to be by myself. Everybody who comes here wants information. I'm tired of talking to people. The next thing you know it'll be.....

[school]

Johnstone: I'm sorry about this Sister, the pipes burst next door and we were afraid you might have some flooding. You mind if we check? Water damage can be pretty expensive.

Annie: Oh, no. Please. Thanks for letting us know. The last thing we need is another big expense around here.

Johnstone: Don't worry Sister, we have everything under control.

Annie: I hope it won't take long, there's a school dance tonight.

[that night, at the dance]

Voice of a girl: And now a favorite from 1978. [Heart of Glass]

Wanda: These St. Arnold guys are such geeks.

Tiffany: Totally.

Ms. Fraser: You know your make up is exquisite.

Melissa: Thanks. Sister Ann did it.

Ms. Fraser: You see that young man over by the punch bowl gulping down cup after cup? I think he's trying to work up the courage to come ask you to dance.

Melissa: Come on, he's not even looking this way.

Ms. Fraser: You'll have to trust me Melissa that I have a profound understanding of the interior working of a young man's mind.

Melissa: God, I'm not going to be able to do this.

Ms. Fraser: Sure you will.

Melissa: He's coming over. What do I do?

Ms. Fraser: Show him your teeth.

Punch bowl boy: Um, do you um want to dance?

[they go out to the dance floor]

[Celine is in the basement]

St. Arnold Teacher: Can't you dance Ms. Fraser?

Ms. Fraser: Uh, no. Thank you, thank you. I'm just here as an observer.

St. Arnold Teacher:[takes her by the hand and leads her to dance floor]: Get down already. You can really move for a big woman. [Ms. Fraser giggles] I like big women. More of a good thing, you know.

Ray: I'm cutting in, Jack.

St. Arnold Teacher: We're not finished.

Ray: Take a hike.

Ms. Fraser: Thank you.

Ray: You owe me. [he starts dancing]

Ms. Fraser: For what?

Ray: For saving you from dancing with a guy.

Ms. Fraser: Well it would appear that I am still dancing with a guy.

Ray: Right. So Ness' gun.

Ms. Fraser: Keep going or we won't be able to talk.

Ray: Who still disco's?

Ms. Fraser: The St. Fortuna School apparently.

Ray: That Ness' gun?

Ms. Fraser: Hm humm.

Ray: And Netti's flask.

Ms. Fraser: Hm humm.

Ray: It all comes from back in '31 on the school grounds.

Fraser: Where on the grounds?

Ray: Well that's what no one knows for the last 60 years. Until Celine and Todd found it. They know.

Ms. Fraser: Ah, well Melissa didn't say anything about this. Which makes me wonder what other things she's kept secret. [looks around for Melissa, but doesn't see her] Sorry, she's gone.

[Johnstone and Al nab Celine]

Ray: alright, she's gone. I'll take the front, you take the back.

Ms. Fraser: Ray, wait. [sniffs around. Stops at an older nun and sniffs her feet]

Nun: Can I help you Ms. Fraser?

Ms. Fraser: Uh, yes, please, sister. Could you tell me where you've been for the last hour or so?

Nun: At the print shop in the basement. West wing.

Fraser: Basement. Thank you. Ray.

[basement]

Melissa: Celine?

Wanda: Where you going Ducky?

Melissa: Nowhere.

Tiffany: It doesn't look like it. It looks like she's going somewhere.

Wanda: You're right, Tess, lets go find out.

[Celine is tied to a steam pipe]

Johnstone: Where is it?

Celine: I don't know. [he lets out some steam]

Johnstone: Next time you'll be getting the steam cleaning. Oh, Celine, I know where the stuff you've been selling me comes from. I've heard all the stories. Now where is the entrance to the vault?

Celine: Todd knew where it was.

Al: Johnstone!

Melissa: Celine!

Johnstone: Well, well, well, it's a party. Maybe you'd talk a little batter if it was one of your friends.

Celine: No.

Melissa: No.

Celine: No, please.

[Ms. Fraser and Ray are in basement, but it's huge]

Ray: How do you know they're in here?

Ms. Fraser: Fungus, Ray.

Ray: of course. [echo of Ow! Ow! Ow!] Sounds like they're this way.

Ms. Fraser: Then I suggest we go this way.

Ray: Do I dare ask for an explanation or I just take your word for it?

Ms. Fraser: Well, it's similar to the Doppler effect, Ray, where in the echoes bounce off the walls of the corridor and the pitch of the sound waves changes and amplifies…

Ray: I'll take your word for it.

Ms. Fraser: Very good.

[Celine must have told him where the entrance is cause they are there now]

Wanda: Oh my God.

Johnstone: Totally. Al, you come get a load and then come back for some more.

Wanda: Ow!

Johnstone: Ladies, you're gonna take a seat over here.

Ms. Fraser: The girls aren't alone.

Fraser: The Doppler effect?

Ms. Fraser: Size 12 running shoe. [to Al] Excuse me.

Al: Shouldn't you be grading papers or something gorgeous? [Ms. Fraser laughs, then decks Al, takes his gun and hands it to Ray who tucks in away, but still retains his own]

Johnstone: Drop the gun. Drop it. Drop it.

Ray: You don't want to do this, I'm a cop.

Johnstone: Well that's too bad. We don't like cops.

[Melissa sees Celine slip out]

Melissa: Wait. Celine. Where are you going?

Johnstone: Never mind them, we got to take care of these nice folks first.

Melissa: Wait Celine.

Celine: Come on. We have to get out of here.

Melissa: No! I can't. I'm not going. I can't leave Ms. Fraser.

Celine: What are you talking about? They're going to kill us. We've got to get out of here.

Melissa: No, Celine, I always do what you want but not this time.

Celine: It's no good for us. Remember we're going to go away.

Melissa: No, Celine. This is going to be good for you. Ms. Fraser's my friend and I'm not leaving. You can go it you want to. [leaves her standing there]

Johnstone: You never know. They might find you if they open this place up again in 60 years.

Melissa: Ms. Fraser! Duck! [throws a bottle, misses everyone, Ms. Fraser and

Johnstone scuffle around until Johnstone starts to throw a punch]

Ms. Fraser: No! No! You wouldn't his a woman would you? [he hesitates, Ms.

Fraser knees him, then punches him]

Celine: This ones for Todd. [throws a bottle]

[Fraser sees the label on the broken bottle - The Glenndolane -Melissa picks up another bottle and throws it. Ms. Fraser catches it falling to the floor,

losing his wig at the same time]

Melissa: Oh my God! Ms. Fraser, you're a cross-dresser!

[in front of the school. Paddy wagon cop just closing the door, re lights flashing everywhere, kids milling around the grounds]

Wanda: We we almost like got killed.

Tiffany: We almost did get killed you dip.

Annie: You okay?

Ray: Yeah. You?

Annie: Yeah. Yeah. The things in the vault will really help the school out. I owe you one Ray.

Ray: Aw, call it even.

Annie: Even for what?

Ray: You know. You, me, Ricky Stangles basement. It was all my fault.

Annie: your fault? What? You think you ruined my life? That I had to become a nun?

Ray: Well, I didn't say that.

Annie: Uh huh. It must feel awful to think you're responsible for the waste of a perfectly good woman.

Ray: I am?

Annie: No, Ray. Look, I wanted to go to Ricky Stangles basement as much as you did. But after we got caught, I let you take all the blame. I'm the one who owes you an apology, Ray.

Ray: Really?

Annie: Yeah, I was a coward. After that I decided to never be afraid of my own feelings again. That's what led me here.

Ray: So I'm not going to be struck down by lightening?

Annie: No, not this time. It would be a waste of a perfectly good man.

[Fraser is back in uniform. Melissa and he are standing together]

Fraser: You're very brave Melissa. I'd like to thank you for saving my life.

Melissa: You lied to me.

Fraser: About what?

Melissa: About being a woman.

Fraser: Oh yes, that. Well, yeah. Yes I did lie about that. Those weren't my clothes, that wasn't my hair.

Melissa: Those weren't your breasts?

Fraser: No, those weren't my breasts. But other than that, everything I said was the truth.

Melissa: Well that's good because the hair color wasn't right anyway.

Fraser: Oh, thank you. I'll remember that for the next time.

[Ray and Fraser head for the car]

Ray: You ready?

Fraser: Yes.

Ray: You know Benny, you weren't a bad looking woman.

Fraser: Thank you Ray.

Ray; Of course, you weren't exactly my type either.

Fraser: What exactly is your type Ray?

Ray: Well, I like a woman who is kind and honest and a good sense of humor.

Fraser: Well I don't have those qualities?

Ray: No, no, you do I just like a woman who you know, is a woman.

Fraser: Well that's-that's just picky Ray.

Ray: Ah don't get in a snit.

Fraser: Well I'm not.

Ray: Well good.

Fraser: Well fine.

Ray: So, what you are doing after work?

Fraser: Nothing with you.

Ray; You are soooo sensitive.

THE END